Dear Stepmom: A Mother’s Day Letter Just For You

Consider this love letter a bouquet of flowers just for you on Mother's Day, Stepmoms!

Dear Stepmothers:

In honor of Mother’s Day, I’m sending a shout-out to all you stepmom types out there wondering how to handle this somewhat confusing holiday. If you have children of your own, you probably have your Sunday covered. Macaroni pictures and a PBJ sandwich for breakfast are probably forthcoming. That’s the best, isn’t it? Cuddles and hugs and jelly kisses rock my world, too. There’s no better present, even if they smear peanut butter all over the kitchen floor.

It’s different when you’re a stepmom, especially if you are longing for children of your own.

I am fortunate in that my stepchildren would come back to our house on Mother’s Day night to celebrate with me when they were little. That has always meant more to me than I can ever say, and I am thankful that their mother shared them. I know that many stepmothers aren’t as lucky as I have been, and I would like to take a moment to celebrate “Bonus Moms” everywhere.

Stepmom, you married a guy and became an Insta-Parent. Your marriage has revolved around children since before you even wrote your vows. Many women get to bask in the glow of newlyweddom for awhile, but not you, Honey. If you even got a honeymoon, you jumped right into washing skid-marked drawers immediately upon your return. Bless you.

The More The Merrier

There will always be “another woman” in your life, like it or not. This woman has and will have a great impact on your life, at least until the kids are grown. This could be a veritable gleesome threesome—or it may not. Society now encourages step and bio moms to get along. Studies show that an amicable relationship between the women helps the kids tremendously. It did in our case when the kids were younger. That doesn’t make it easy. This Mother’s Day, go do something nice for yourself. It takes a special woman to open her heart to a family like this and dedicate herself to making it work.Remember to give yourself credit for your awesomeness and for all you bring to your family, Stepmom!

Your stepkids may adore you, or they may despise you.  It’s beyond terrific when love flows smoothly, and it can be a heartbreak visible from Pluto when they turn their backs on you. Regardless of your status in anyone’s eyes this Mother’s Day, celebrate your awesomeness. This is a tough job, and no one tells you straight what the expectations are. Some days make sense. Other times it feels like you’re neck deep in Crap Creek and your boat’s on the bottom. Regardless of the day, week, month, year, or life you’ve had, you’re there, and you’re trying. Take a break from it all and get a massage. You deserve it.

Celebrate!

Whether or not your stepkids celebrate you on this holiday or not, celebrate yourself. Get up with some other stepmom friends for toddies and party together. Tell your husband exactly how you would like to spend the day, and let him spoil you rotten. You don’t have to wait for anyone else’s approval to feel proud of your role as a stepmom. If folks choose to judge you, chances are they aren’t stepmoms and wouldn’t survive a half-mile walk in your moccasins, so forget ‘em. When you validate yourself, you give off a different vibe. It’s hard to be huffy around a woman who shines. So here’s a cyber-bouquet, Ladies!  Have a wonderful Mother’s Day!

Love,

A Fellow Stepmom

This bundle contains hands-on sorts, activities, and assessments to help students identify and differentiate between adjectives and adverbs. Kids learn best through multiple modalities--this product appeals to all learners, especially your kinesthetic children.
If you need more help trying to describe motherhood or stepmotherhood, I made some adjective and adverb activities for you. If you’re an elementary or homeschool teacher or a stepmom trying to help your stepkids get grammar, check these out!.
Kids need many opportunities to read and practice their fluency. When teachers can combine fluency practice with social studies skills, so much the better!
Stepmoms are strong women. Check out this Readers’ Theater play about other strong women through history.

 

 

 

16 thoughts on “Dear Stepmom: A Mother’s Day Letter Just For You

  • May 12, 2017 at 11:24 am
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    Aww, I often think that step mums must feel a bit like a third wheel on mothers day, it’s so nice that you got to share the children and both have a special day. I guess it’s similar to the saying ‘any man can be a father but it takes a special man to be a dad’ being a mother doesn’t just mean biologically. Happy mothers day to all the mummies, biological and not 😀 x

    Sophia x http://sophiawhitham.co.uk

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    • May 13, 2017 at 1:29 am
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      Thanks so much for the sweet, sweet comments. The third wheel thing is a big deal, but it doesn’t have to be!

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    • May 13, 2017 at 1:31 am
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      Thanks so much! Have a great day, too!!

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  • May 12, 2017 at 2:10 pm
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    It’s so important that step moms and step dads get the same recognition. Often times they worry and care for their step kids just as much as the bio parents do, so why should they get any less recognition! Have a great mother’s day, from one mom to the other 🙂

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    • May 13, 2017 at 1:32 am
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      True that! Bless you and have a wonderful Mother’s Day!!

      Reply
  • May 12, 2017 at 4:58 pm
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    Love this! Thank you for sharing a step-mom perspective on Mother’s Day.

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    • May 13, 2017 at 1:33 am
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      Awww! Thank you so much for stopping by and commenting!

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    • May 14, 2017 at 1:36 am
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      Thank you so much! Being a stepmom is both challenging and incredibly rewarding!

      Reply
  • May 13, 2017 at 7:06 am
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    What a great tribute to steps moms out there! I feel that they deserve all the credit for everything a mom does!

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    • May 14, 2017 at 1:36 am
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      Thank you so much. It’s great when someone gets it!

      Reply
  • May 13, 2017 at 7:18 am
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    I think this is beautiful, Step Mums are just as important as real mums. It takes guts to take up someone’s child and raise them as your own.

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    • May 14, 2017 at 1:37 am
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      Thank you so much! It’s worth it!

      Reply
  • May 15, 2017 at 10:26 pm
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    This is a heartfelt and honest post. Happy Mother’s Day.

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    • May 16, 2017 at 11:13 am
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      Happy Mother’s Day! Hope it was a great one-thanks for stopping by!

      Reply

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