I’ve been pretty focused on trying to balance my life and reconnect with some sanity around here. I wrote about finding some chill here and here, so I thought I would share what happened when I attempted to have a me day–a Day of Peace and Self Improvement–last week. A Me Day. Snort. April Fool’s. Here’s what happened along with some affiliate links so you can have your own Day of Peace and Self Improvement just like me.
The first thing I did on my Day of Peace and Self Improvement was to take a short jog. Considering the fact that I haven’t run in many weeks, I knew this would be nothing short of challenging. I slapped on my Brooks running shoes, fired up my tunes, and headed up the driveway. Let me emphasize the word UP. We live amidst hills. For strong runners, these hills are speedbumps. For me, it’s somewhat like scaling Mt. Everest.
To put it mildly, I thought I was going to die. And yet running felt so good. My knees and ankles cussed me and my bladder laughed hysterically, but I stuck with it. Somewhere around mile 0.7, however, my beagle decided to involve herself in my Day of Peace and Self-Improvement. Our Crackhead beagle is a might obese. She jiggled, wobbled, and panted right along beside me for a bit. Our little workout sesh was quite pleasant until the squirrel showed up.
Crackhead caught sight of the little bugger out of the corner of her eye and forgot her sudden interest in my fitness goals. Before I realized what was happening, my beagle started to yip, took a hard right turn, and swept both legs out from under me with more effectiveness than a Mui Thai fighter. From my vantage point on my chubby hind parts, I saw my poor, fat dog chug off into the woods like a steam locomotive with no more hope of catching that squirrel than I had of completing mile one.
The second thing I did on my Day of Peace and Self-Improvement was pop three Advil and fill up a footbath tub with Listerine, vinegar, and water to soften my hooves and possibly make them hurt less from my foray up the driveway. I put on my favorite fleece pajamas and rubbed an oatmeal mask on my face. When I walked out of the bathroom to get some lavender oil to put in my diffuser in hopes of adding some more self-improvement ambiance, my six year old son came around the corner. He looked up from whatever alien he was pretending to kill with his lightsaber, took one look at me in my favorite granny jammies and oatmeal mask, and screamed. He then began to sob uncontrollably.
“You scared-ed me so bad, Mama,” he cried. “Don’t ever do that again! You wook so evil!”
And then he ran away. So I took my lavender oil and retreated back to the bathroom where aliens can safely nest in peace. Looking terrifying can have its perks.
I sat quietly soaking my feet and contemplating peace and self-improvement. I felt sure that the foot-smoothing recipe I’d found on Pinterest would make my tootsies look a bit less like they could swoop down and catch my dinner from a lake.
Despite all my efforts, the only change I could see in my feet was their color. They were blue. In fact, they were so blue that they nicely complemented the lovely shade of indigo taking over my left hip. I looked at the time on my phone. My Day of Peace and Self-Improvement had lasted for 45 minutes, and I looked like a Smurf.
About that time, Crackhead returned, squirrel-less and panting, scratching at the window. My kids were banging into the bedroom door with their light saber fight. Since I had grown neither peaceful nor improved, I picked up a stray light saber lying around and joined the fray. My kids squealed with delight, I got my heart rate up, and I got a matching bruise on my right hip from a good jab from the Dark Side. I think my day went well after all.
In Other News…
This post has been linked to Mama Kat’s World Famous Writing Work Shop.
I am also a part of the Ultimate Blog Challenge. I’ll be posting an article each day during the month of April. I’m super-stoked to get new ideas, boost traffic, and learn more about blogging and social media through this group. I’ll be receiving daily inspirational emails with ideas for posts and suggestions, and I’m now a member of their Facebook group. Check them out! This will be a strenuous, but worthwhile endeavor!
Guess what else? My first post on Her View From Home goes live today! I can’t wait! Please hop on over there and visit my comparison between Las Vegas and New Motherhood. It’s worth the gamble. HA!
As always, check out my Teacher’s Pay Teachers store for some fun products for your classroom or homeschool! These activities have been proven in my own classroom to help kids grasp literacy concepts, and that’s no April Fool’s joke!